If you don’t mind, I would like to make a few requests of you. While I don’t wish to appear dogmatic and inflexible, and if I may be blunt, you are of absolutely no use or merit to me should you decline my requests. So if I may, here they are:
- A little less rancour please. From everyone, including myself.
- A little more dignity and honour in politics, if you don’t mind. A dash of ethics would be nice too.
- A bit less complaining and a bit more listening.
- An end date on the Lady Gaga thing? I don’t begrudge her some success and, yes, the tunes are toe tappers, but really …
- You know, not only do I not mind the snow and cold, I kind of like it. After all, I live in Canada and if I really disliked it I could probably go elsewhere. But could you turn that damn fan off? The wind is killing me.
- Could you somehow filter out all the complaints about social networks as well as all the noise about how they’ve changed the world and ain’t it wonderful?
- On a similar note, could you put a stop to the claims, made whenever something new gains some traction, that this or that is dead?
- I would be extremely pleased and grateful if you could feed everyone, clothe everyone, house everyone, educate everyone and generally be a bit more thoughtful of everyone, everywhere. Listen — if you want to be distinguished in the great panoply of years, that’s the way to go. Ain’t no one seen that before!
The ball’s in your court now, 2010.
Listen 
